Asking for Help!

Updated: Nov 11, 2020

Why is asking for help so hard? Maybe it's because of our past, maybe it's because we view it as a sign of weakness.

Do you feel if you ask for someone for help you will have to return the favor?

Or just the thought of asking for help makes you question yourself, and your abilities?

Well, I'm here to tell you that

Asking for help is not a weakness, it's actually a sign of strength!

“And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more .”

~ Erica Jong

We are going to discuss:

  • Effective ways to ask for help.

  • Rehearsed how to ask for help.

  • Explore patients experience in asking for help

Asking for help

  • It is very common to have difficulty asking for help if you have PTSD and substance abuse.

  • You must get help from others to recover. No one can do it alone.

  • In learning to ask for help, start “small”: Practice on safe people, with a simple request.

  • Try to ask for help before a problem becomes overwhelming. But you can call any time – before, during; or after a hard time.

  • Prepare how you'll handle it if the person refuses your request for help.

  • In asking for help, you don't have to “spill” everything.

  • Asking for help makes you stronger and more independent in the long run.

  • Learning to ask for help may feel very awkward at first.

  • If there is no one in your life to ask for help from, work on building a support network.

  • When asking for help, be gentle - no demands, threats, or insults.

  • Discover whether your fears are accurate: Compare your prediction to reality.

  • Carry in your wallet a list of phone numbers you can call


Answer the first three questions first. Later, after you’ve approached the person, answer the last question.

  1. Who will you talk to?

  2. What will you say?

  3. What do you predict will happen?

  4. What did happen in reality?

You may want to ask yourself:

  • What did you learn from trying this?

  • Did you get what you wanted, or at least part of what you wanted?

  • Is there anything you might do differently next time?

  • How do you feel about your experience?

  • How difficult was it?


Commit to one action that will move your life forward! It can be anything you feel will help you or you can try one of the ideas on the next page.

Keeping your commitment is a way of respecting, honoring, and caring for yourself

Option one: Write a list of people you can call when you're having problems (wanting to talk, feeling afraid, drug cravings, need a ride, etc…) including friends, family members, self-help sponsors, treaters, hotlines, drop-in centers, and anyone you can think of the example below :

Option two: Work on your approach Questions (Example below)

If you would like further help in achieving these goals or asking for help, please reach out to us at We would love an opportunity to assist you further. We have a variety of FREE workshops online or in person, we look forward to working with you soon.

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